Dream a Little Dream
by SeGate
Summary: Kid and Lou are delighted to be expecting their first child, so why is Kid avoiding Lou? And will her stubborn streak cost them both their happiness?


Lou paced before the kitchen window, nervously biting her lip. Kid was spending more and more time in the barn "fixing" things or out riding the property. It was beginning to make her nervous. They'd only been married a short while, and if he was already avoiding her… Well, it would certainly make life harder.

Pulling out a chair, Lou dropped into it heavily. The table was set for dinner, but the food had long since grown cold. She knew she wasn't as good a cook as Rachel or Emma, but she was proud of her roast chicken. Yet the poor bird sat untouched in the middle of the table, flanked by sputtering candles. She'd really hoped to impress Kid with dinner tonight, but now she was at a loss.

She rested a hand on her abdomen. Despite the doctor assuring her she was, in fact, nearly six months pregnant, it was only in the last month that her abdomen had finally begun to grow round and full. She'd been so sure the Kid would be thrilled with the news of their first child, and at first he was. But after she'd been so ill with morning sickness he started to keep his distance.

Lou chuckled mirthlessly. Morning sickness. What a joke that was! It was more like all day sickness with a side of waking up in the middle of the night sickness. She'd been miserable. And Kid's slow but definite withdrawal from her only made it worse.

Standing up to stretch her sore muscles, she looked out toward the barn again. Seeing no movement, no sign of Kid heading back to the house for the night, she growled in frustration. She was sorely tempted to leave the overlooked meal on the table and head to bed for the night, but she remembered Rachel and Teaspoon's advice. Both, in their own ways, had encouraged her to always meet Kid halfway. Maybe keeping her worries to herself wasn't the best way to go this time.

Swallowing her pride and trepidation, Lou packed the chicken, biscuits, and lemonade into a basket along with the blanket she kept for picnics. If Kid wouldn't come to dinner, dinner would come to Kid. As she walked across the yard to the barn, she was very much aware of the sound of her own steps. She felt so isolated and alone as she made her way through the darkness. This quiet made her nervous, with its oppressive weight adding to the worries swirling through her mind. What if the Kid turned her away?

And though the walk had seemed like it might never end, so busy was her mind tormenting her, that she was surprised to find herself at the door of the barn. She stood there, momentarily puzzled over what to do next. Should she walk right in or knock first? The idea of knocking on the barn door seemed absurd, but simply strolling in made her feel even more vulnerable.

_I rode across the wild west, hell for leather. I've fought criminals. When did this become my life?_ Giving herself a mental shake, she opened the door and let herself in. "Hey, Kid…"

But her breezy affectation was all for naught. Kid lay sleeping in the fresh, loose hay. For a moment she was struck by how young he looked, but then her eye for detail took note of the scene. He was laying on one saddle blanket and was covered by another. Under his head was the pillow she had missed from the spare room. This wasn't an accidental nap. Kid hadn't been overcome with a sudden bout of exhaustion. He had never planned to come inside. At least not anytime soon.

Why? Why was he trying so hard to avoid her? When had sleeping in the barn become preferable to sharing a bed with her? Part of her wanted to march over to his sleeping form and kick him. Hard. But mostly she just wanted to cry. To weep with frustration. To shed bitter tears of sadness and hurt.

Unfortunately for Louise, the tears won. Before she even realized it, her vision blurred as the salty drops filled her eyes and began to spill down her cheeks. The first sob caught her by surprise. Her hand clapped over her mouth in an effort to contain her distress, but Kid stirred at the sound.

Even worse than discovering her husband preferred sleeping in the barn to sleeping with her, was the moment he made eye contact with her. She could see regret wash over him. And while a tiny voice inside whispered that he obviously felt bad about causing her distress, a much louder voice within told her that this regret was only for getting caught. If he called out to her, she never heard his voice over the noise of her own tears and crunch of the ground beneath her running feet.

Lou had never been one to run from trouble. It was more her way to go out looking for it. But here she was… Running as if her life depended on it. And in some ways it did. How could she go through life like this? It would have been easier if Kid had struck her or had an affair. She would've felt secure in her self-righteous fury. But instead all she had was his kindness. His cold, debilitating, distant kindness. How could she be upset over that?

She thought back to their first night together, to their ups and downs, and to his proposal. Everything they had shared had been marked by passion. When they loved, when they fought, when they made up… It was always with everything they had in them. But Kid was holding that passion back from her now. And it was the thing that always held them together. He was becoming little more than a roommate. And it seemed as if he didn't even want to be that anymore.

She finally began to slow down, as a pain cramped her side. She was in good shape, but her experience running usually involved a horse. She gripped her aching waist and continued to walk. The darkness was thick and heavy, but she wasn't afraid. She knew this land well, and wasn't at all surprised to realize that she was walking toward the creek.

Lou loved to visit the banks of the little creek that wound its way through their property. She and Kid used to picnic there at least once or twice a week. They would eat whatever lunch she packed, then they would talk and rest cuddled close together. More than once their lazy lunches had turned into lovemaking.

That thought halted her in her tracks, making her feel abruptly lost. Somehow everything seemed to be slipping away, just as it should have been coming into focus. Kid had talked about having kids someday, and she had longed for them as well. A part of her had always been afraid that the trauma she'd experienced when she was still a girl might make her unable to have children, so the news that she was expecting had been a joyful little miracle. But now her joy was rapidly turning to dismay as Kid distanced himself from her.

Even her happy memories of her favorite bit of land were fading away, leaving her sad and out of sorts. Again she was a motherless child. Teaspoon would have advice for her, but he was off visiting Amanda and Hack as they welcomed their new son. And Rachel had gone to visit Cody and his new wife. Lou felt utterly bereft.

She couldn't even seek comfort from her brothers. Jimmy and Buck wanted to be home when the baby was born, so they were off visiting family and taking care of some ranch business before the birth. Even if they'd been around, she would have been loathe to discuss this problem with them. Though after tonight, she was desperate enough to spill her secrets to Tompkins. And she could almost imagine him selling her a cast iron skillet to set Kid straight.

She was suddenly very tired. As she turned to head back toward the house, she found herself a bit unsteady. Pregnancy had recently shifted her center of gravity, and that combined with fatigue and the darkness caused her to stumble. Her foot caught under a raised root. And though she threw out a hand to catch herself against the tree, down she went. She landed awkwardly and pain shot through her ankle. The intense pain and odd angle of the joint told her it was broken. Her inability to move her foot and toes just reinforced her belief.

And now she was well and truly stuck. She couldn't crawl home. There was nothing to do but laugh. She laughed at her bad luck, laughed at her current situation, and laughed until she cried. When the tears finally came, they were prolific. She sobbed until she hiccupped, and then she sobbed some more. She was weeping so loudly she didn't hear Kid's call.

When she felt a warm hand on her shoulder, she jumped slightly. She could see the worry in Kid's face thanks to the bright moonlight. Though the night sky seemed to promise rain,with its heavy clouds looming on the horizon, the sky above them still allowed moments of brightness. His eyes searched her face until she looked away, swiping at her eyes with dusty hands. She had never liked showing anyone her weaknesses, and here she sat, crying like a baby.

"Whaddaya want, Kid?" Her effort to sound uncaring and detached was ruined by a traitorous hiccup.

"Lou, what's wrong?" His voice was gentle and slightly confused. "Why are ya all the way out here?"

Hurt flared within her. How could he ask such a question? "Nothin'. Why dontcha just go on back to the barn?" Bitterness tinged her words.

Kid lowered himself to the ground next to her, sighing deeply. "Look, Lou, I didn't mean to upset ya. Can't we talk about this?"

"I ain't upset, and I ain't got nothin' ta say on it, Kid." She looked away as a tear managed to escape her eye and slide down her damp cheek. Her voice cracked as she continued. "Just go home."

Another sigh. "If ya don't wanna talk about it now, fine. But you're comin' back to the house with me."

Lou wasn't sure where her stubborn streak came from sometimes. She knew she needed help, lest she find herself crawling the long distance to the house. But when Kid had the gall to order her back home with him, she couldn't do anything but disagree. "I can take care of mahself, Kid. I'll be back later."

"Lou, I know you're upset. And I know ya don't like it when I tell ya what to do, but it's late, it's dark, and ya didn't bring yer gun." She opened her mouth to argue, but he continued, "Not to mention the fact that you're on foot." Then he finished her off with the only argument she was powerless against. "At least think about the baby. If somethin' happens to you, well, it ain't just you anymore."

As much as Lou wanted to shout at him and stomp proudly off on her own, she instead began to weep anew. She sobbed, unable to stem the flood of emotions. Kid swore under his breathe and within moments was dabbing her face with his handkerchief. His touch was gentle, and, when she finally met his eyes, the tenderness she saw there made her throw her arms around his neck and cry even harder than before.

"Oh Lou." Kid stroked her hair and held her tight. "Please let me take ya home."

After blowing her nose loudly into Kid's handkerchief, she acquiesced. "Alright."

Kid stood quickly and reached out for her hand. Lou was sure he could see her chagrined expression even though the moon was currently hidden behind an inky cloud. "Um, Kid, I…"

"What is it? Ya already said you'd come home." Kid reached down and captured her small hand in his, tugging her upward. "There's a storm brewin'. We need to get back."

Unable to stop the momentum that pulled her upward, Lou cried out in pain. Her knees went weak, and combined with Kid's shock, she slumped back to the ground. He was immediately crouched by her side, his voice holding a thread of panic. "Lou! What is it? Are ya hurt?"

Gritting her teeth against the throbbing agony that was now her left ankle, she nodded. "I tripped earlier and hurt my ankle. I'm sure it's broken."

Before she realized what was happening, Kid swept her up into his arms. She laid her arm across his shoulders, protesting. "Kid, it's too far fer ya to be luggin' me the whole way. I can just wait here fer ya to go get the wagon or a horse."

Just as Kid opened his mouth to respond, the dark clouds above them sent a deluge of rain. "Any other suggestions?" His terse tone told her he was equal parts worried about her injury and mad at her willingness to send him away earlier.

They walked most of the way home in silence, the relentless rain and spent emotions leaving them both feeling cold and weary. About a mile from home Kid slipped in the mud and stumbled, jarring Lou so that her injured ankle bounced painfully. She cried out, the pain making her feel faint.

Kid steadied himself, apologized, and adjusted his hold until she was again secure in his embrace. When they finally reached the house, both were worn out. Kid hurried her inside and set her on the rug in front of the fireplace. He seemed to be everywhere at once: putting water on the stove to boil, bringing her a warm flannel nightgown, towels, and blanket, and offering her a pillow to prop up her injured leg. When her icy fingers fumbled with the buttons on her blouse, he was soon there brushing her trembling hands away and deftly working all the buttons. He helped her free herself from her sopping wet clothing.

A few busy minutes later Lou found herself sipping hot willow bark tea, her wet hair wrapped in a towel to keep her flannel nightgown dry. A blanket was draped across her shoulders, and the freshly lit fire was beginning to banish the chill the seemed to linger in her joints.

Though she'd tried to convince him to wait until morning, Kid had insisted on riding to town to fetch the doctor. She knew it made sense to get her ankle set as soon as possible, but she hated for Kid to ride out into the rainy night. If only Buck or Rachel had been around…

By the time the sun broke free of the horizon and started its climb into the sky, the doctor had set Lou's broken ankle and gone on to his next patient. The pain associated with having her broken joint pulled and straightened had made Lou feel weak and nauseated. Kid had been nearly beside himself when the doctor said he didn't think he had it adjusted correctly after the first two attempts. Thankfully he was satisfied with the third try, otherwise Lou had begun to feel a genuine fear that Kid might draw down on the clueless physician.

"Buck can never leave again!" Kid's voice was terse as he shut the door behind the doctor.

Lou wanted to make a witty comment to tease the Kid, but she was still feeling rather faint. "Tea," was all she could muster. "More tea."

Kid nearly fell over his own feet scrambling to get to the kitchen. He returned in minutes with a steaming mug of tea. Lou accepted the cup with a hint of a smile, relishing the warmth of the vessel against her hands. She shivered involuntarily, a reflex that prompted Kid to add another blanket to her cocoon and another log to the fire. She appreciated his attentiveness, but could see that he was fighting the urge to scold her for her earlier recklessness.

The combination of the tea, blankets, and fire were finally suffusing her limbs with warmth. Her thoughts seemed to slow down and her eyelids grew heavy. Sleep beckoned her with promises of relief and peace. Despite her struggles to stay awake, she soon slipped into an uneasy slumber.

_Darkness enveloped her as she stumbled along blindly. She had to keep moving, keep searching. Lou didn't know where she was, but she knew she had to find something. Tripping over an unknown obstacle, she threw up her hands to break her fall. Something felt different about how she moved. Her hands drifted toward her abdomen, seeking the reassuring bulk that had been part of her for the past months. Instead of the burgeoning belly she expected, Lou's hands found only empty space. The return of her trim waistline had devastating implications._

_Before she could think through all the implications of this discovery, a cry in the distance drew her attention. Her baby! Of course, she had already had the baby. But where was it? The cry was distant, but clearly distressed. Why was she so far from her baby? And which way should she go?_

_Lou's heart beat faster and faster. The cry seemed to come from every direction, as if she were drowning in the sound of her baby's suffering. With no obvious path or certain destination available, Lou ran blindly. Branches whipped about her, stinging as they lashed her skin. Still she ran, tripping over roots and stones. She fell and rose up again and again. _

_Though still unable to see, Lou knew she was bleeding. Winded and weak, she finally glimpsed a light in the distance. Staggering onward, she could finally discern that the source of the light was a single house. Her baby's cries grew louder, and she could hear the sounds of a violent struggle. Somehow she knew that Kid was inside the house, fighting for all he was worth._

_Reaching the front porch of the home at last, Lou stumbled up the steps and fell heavily against the door. Her strength deserting her, she managed to open the door and drag herself inside. The wailing of her child led her up the stairs and down a dimly lit hallway. Though she tried to hurry, her body seemed unable to comply and instead moved ever more slowly. _

_When she finally reached the source of all the commotion, she opened the door with a trembling hand. Kid was locked in a struggle with a tall man, the baby screaming from the crib. As Lou stepped into the room, she saw the man pull out a gun. Before she could call out a warning or somehow intervene, the loud report of the weapon echoed in her ears. Kid was collapsing onto the floor, crimson staining the fabric of his shirt just above his heart. The light left his eyes, leaving Lou reeling._

_The tall man's movement drew her eye as he strode over to the crib. He scooped up the wailing infant before turning to face Lou. Her voice froze in her throat. How could it be? As he advanced on her she knew death was imminent. There would be no way out for her or her child. Her fate was cast when she was still a girl, and this man had done the damming._

"Louise… Lou, wake up." Hands held her shoulders firmly, but gently.

Afraid to open her eyes, Lou struggled against the pressure on her arms. She screamed and fought, finding surprising strength in her panic.

"Ow! Lou!" A bewildered voice, much like Kid's cried out in pain and confusion.

Lou snapped her eyes open, half scared she would see her husband's bloody form again. And she did, except the blood this time came from his nose. He eyed her warily, clutching his face with one hand while the other was rooting through his pockets. Finally he pulled out a handkerchief and used it to hold his bleeding nose.

"Kid?" Lou raised a tremulous hand to her head in confusion. Her skin felt clammy and her head thick. "What happened?"

"After ya fell asleep, ya got feverish. Started talkin' out of yer head and gettin' all upset." He eyed her warily as he sat at her feet. "Can ya remember what ya were dreamin'?"

Lou closed her eyes and shuddered. "I can't get it out of mah mind, Kid." Taking a deep breath, she looked into Kid's bright blue eyes.

His brows furrowing in concern, he reached out to lay a cool hand against her forehead. Frowning, he spoke, "Maybe we should get ya into bed; yer still pretty warm."

"No!" Kid looked startled at her vehemence, but Lou was shaken enough that she wasn't ready to consider the possibility of falling asleep and revisiting her nightmare. "Please, Kid. I'm fine, really." She reached out and clutched his free hand.

Kid seemed hesitant as he pulled his handkerchief away from his nose to check if the bleeding had stopped. Wincing with obvious discomfort, he sighed and closed his eyes. Before she realized what he was about, Lou found herself scooped up in his arms and headed for the stairs. He didn't respond to her impassioned protests, nor did he stop until he gained the side of their bed.

As he set her down gently on top of the covers, Lou realized to her horror that her eyes were filled with tears. She simply couldn't bear the thought of returning to the nightmare she'd had while sleeping earlier. And the thought of crying in front of the Kid twice in one night was equally intolerable for some reason. There was something between them still, something that made her feel awkward and shy.

So busy was she with her own thoughts and turmoil, that it took Lou several seconds to realize that her husband was removing his shirt and preparing for bed. And despite the tension that had lingered between them, Lou felt a sudden burst of panic at the thought of him leaving her alone yet again. As her mind cast about desperately for the words and courage to ask him to stay, Kid surprised her by turning back the covers before reaching for her. She was tucked under the covers, feeling the coolness of the sheets against her warm skin one moment, the next she was wrapped in her husband's arms.

Relief flooded through her in a cooling rush. As his warm breath ruffled her hair, the intimacy of the moment and the exhaustion of the evening's events overwhelmed her. The tears she had fought to contain minutes earlier now escaped her.

"Lou?" Kid's worried tone made her cry all the more. "Is it yer ankle? I'm sorry, sweetheart. I should have propped it up." He sat up and hurried to gently place a pillow beneath her broken joint. He looked down at her, his sheepish expression making him look like the boy she remembered meeting years before. "I just wanted to get ya in my arms. I guess I just wasn't thinkin' straight."

Lou's heart felt instantly lighter. "Oh Kid… How did we get here? I love ya so much. And ya do still love me, don't ya?"

He looked shocked at her question. "Of course I do! How can ya even ask such a thing?"

He took a breath, but before he could say anything else, Lou broke in, "Why ya been avoidin' me? If ya still love me, why are ya beddin' down in the barn?" And the question that scared her the most, "Or is that ya just don't want tah have babies with me? Somethin' that binds ya to me forever."

His breath whooshed out, just as if she had punched him. She waited in the darkness, fearing his response. When next he spoke his voice was low and fervent, "Louise McCloud, I bound myself to ya forever when we stood in that church and took our vows. Hell, I bound myself to ya forever the moment ya kissed me for not giving away yer secret. And when ya helped save me from the judge in Prosperity. And when ya nearly got yerself killed tryin' to help me escape Lambert. And that night in Red Fern. And a million times since then." He planted one hand by her shoulder, while the other stroked her cheek. "Every time ya said my name with fury, or tenderness, or frustration, or passion. Each and every day that passes has bound me to ya forever." He chuckled under his breath, "Goodness sakes, woman. Ya couldn't be rid of me if ya tried. And I've wanted to have babies with ya nearly as long as I've loved ya."

Lou smiled in the darkness. Though she felt rather foolish now for questioning his love for her, she still couldn't help asking the question that had been nagging her. "But then why are ya avoidin' me all the time? Why were ya sleepin' in the barn?"

Kid leaned back and sighed. "I… Ah, Lou, it's just… I just…" Another sigh as he ran his hand through his hair. "Ya just look so… I mean, yer always…"

Realization dawned. Lou turned her face away, even though she knew Kid could hardly see her. "I understand, Kid. Ya ain't attracted to me now that I'm pregnant."

"No!" Kid's voice sounded horrified. "Gosh, no! Lou, I swear. It's… Well, it's the opposite really. I mean, I always thought ya were the prettiest girl I ever laid eyes on, but now…" He coughed uncomfortably. "Now I think yer so beautiful I can hardly keep my hands off ya."

Lou blinked in utter confusion. "But… Why… I don't understand."

"Well, you were so sick in the beginning. What kind of man tries to… Well, it just wouldn't have been proper to…" Lou could imagine just how flushed the Kid's face must be. Then he continued, his voice lower and more tense. "And once the morning sickness passed, well… I never told ya about this before, but my ma was expectin' once when I was a boy. My pa… My pa wouldn't leave 'er alone. She lost the baby about seven months in." After several moments of heavy silence he spoke again, "Ma was never the same after that."

Reaching out to catch hold of Kid's hand, Lou pulled him to her. She pressed a fervent kiss to his lips and waited as he settled himself next to her. "Kid, I don't mean ta discount yer fears," she began. "But yer pa was a violent man when his kids was around, it ain't a stretch to think he was the same with yer ma behind closed doors." Feeling her husband's chest expand with a breath she could only assume was meant to argue with her, Lou hurried to continue. "Ya remember when we saw Sam and Emma last time? He sure wasn't afraid of touchin' her, and she was big as a house with their youngest then."

They were both quiet for a moment. Lou reached out to tentatively run her hand along Kid's cheek, enjoying the intimacy of the nighttime. "I know ya always been worried about endin' up like yer pa, just as I always been afraid ta end up like my ma. But yer good man, Kid. You ain't anything like yer pa. You've never touched me with anything less than tenderness." She swallowed hard. "And me bein' who I am, and havin' the past I have… I need ya now, more than ever before."

Kid raised himself up on his elbow. "What do ya mean, Lou? Who do ya think ya are?" Defensiveness laced his words.

"Ya know who I am, Kid." Lou spoke matter-of-factly. "I never really got to be girl. And whenever I tried to be one, it went badly. And there ain't nothin' more girly than havin' babies. And there's still a part of me that knows I don't deserve all this."

"Of course ya don't deserve what happened to ya," Kid broke in.

Even though she knew he could barely see her, Lou shook her head sadly. "No, Kid. That ain't what I meant. I know I don't deserve you and this baby. And it scares me." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "What if God realizes I got more than I had comin' to me? I cain't lose you or this baby. I couldn't survive that… But I ain't been good enough to earn all this."

"Lou, I…" Kid tried to interrupt, but Lou pressed onward.

"Ya know what my dream was about earlier? When I got so upset and hit ya in the nose?" She sighed wearily. "I was dreamin' 'bout Wicks. He was here, in our home. And I saw 'im shoot ya… saw the life leave yer eyes. And then he took our baby, and he came fer me. I knew that I was as good as dead, and so was our child."

Kid exhaled a heavy breath. "Oh Lou… But ya know that was just a dream. And Wicks is dead."

"Don't ya see, Kid? He's like a stain on me, on my life. I'll never be rid of him… It's like he's always waitin' ta steal mah sunshine, mah happiness." Lou didn't even fight the tear that slipped from her eye.

"Lou, yer wrong. He's a dead man! Ya can't let him have that kind of power over ya." Kid sounded both bewildered and exasperated.

"Kid, I ain't crazy. I know he's dead. But I guess it's what he represents." Lou swiped a hand across her tearstained face.

"And what does he represent, Lou? Pain? Evil? Hatred?" His voice was fervent and demanding.

Lou hated that she had to spell it all out for her husband, that he pushed her this far. "Dammit, Kid! He represents the truth… The truth about me."

"Wh-What? What are ya talkin' about? What truth?"

"Look at the life I've had! What kind of woman works in a whore house? Or lets Wicks do what he did?" Lou pushed herself up until she was sitting, her ankle still propped up on a pillow. "What kind of woman dresses like a man and takes a man's job? Lives with men and fights beside 'em?"

"A strong woman would do all those things, Lou." Kid held her face between his hands and pressed a kiss to her lips. "Yer strong! And it's one of the things I've always loved about ya." Another kiss. "So what if it ain't what most women do? Ya ain't most women, and that's why I love ya. And why Buck and Cody and Jimmy love ya. Teaspoon don't call ya his girl 'cause ya look pretty in a dress. He loves ya 'cause you've been beside 'im in every fight he's faced since ya met 'im. We all know yer special, Lou. Why don't you?"

Lou didn't know how to respond. She let her silence speak for her.

"Lou, you were just a girl when Wicks forced himself on ya! Ya couldn't have stopped 'im. But ya done what it takes to survive. Emma and Rachel have done the same thing, they just never faced the same dangers you did. Both of 'em are proud to call ya friend, just like we all are." Kid kissed her again, this time on her forehead. "I think some of this is my fault."

"What?" Lou was stunned by his casual admission. "How…"

Kid kissed her question away. "If I hadn't been tryin' ta keep mah distance from ya for so long… Well, I don't think ya'd be so worried about everything. I thought I was protectin' ya, but I was only hurtin' ya in a different way." His forehead rested against hers.

"Oh, Kid… We're both a couple of fools." Her bald confession drew a chuckle from her husband. She drew back from him and allowed herself to fall back on the bed with a soft flump.

He followed her down, wrapping his arms around her again. "How about we make a deal? I'll promise not to be afraid of hurtin' ya, and you'll promise not to expect the worst."

Lou laughed, but her words were tinged with soberness, "And just how are we gonna keep those promises? I don't give mah word lightly, Kid, and I don't know if I can help but expect bad things to happen."

He squeezed her tight. "Well, I think that by me keepin' mah word and keepin' close to ya, ya won't have time to think about all those things… And I think if yer feelin' like yer able to talk to me whenever ya start to worry, then they won't be able ta fester."

Lou felt as though a weight had been lifted from her chest. "Ya know, Kid, I think ya may be right. My ma used ta say 'nothin' healthy grows in the dark.' If we both shine a light on what makes us afraid, it cain't help but be better."

For the rest of the night they talked. The rain continued to pour, but inside Kid and Lou were blissfully unaware. They reveled in the intimacy brought on by the night's revelations. Finally, as dawn arrived still gloomy and wet, Kid insisted that Lou get some rest while he went to do a few chores. After extracting his promise to return to their bed immediately afterward, Lou relented and allowed sleep to claim her.

_She found herself in familiar surroundings, though she was uncertain just where she might be. The darkness seemed to close in all around her, leaving her feeling distinctly unsettled. But when the cry of a distressed infant filled the night, Lou's heart dropped into her stomach. No! Not again…_

_Just as before, she made her way back to the farmhouse. This time, she was pleased to note, she was able to move quite a bit faster. She ran through the front door and up the stairs. As she reached the door, she looked down. This time she was wearing her gun. _

_Drawing her weapon, she burst into the room. Kid was locked in battle with Wicks. Lou aimed at the man who had been the source of so much pain and fired. Wicks staggered toward her, shock etched on his handsome face. She fired again, dropping him to the ground._

_Looking up she saw Kid move over to the crib. He scooped up the baby, soothing the child with soft murmurs and caresses. Lou stepped around the crumpled form of her former nemesis and made her way to her husband's side. Kid eased the baby into her arms, and all Lou could do was admire the beautiful infant. Kid stooped to drop a kiss on her forehead._

Through fluttering eyelids Lou could see that she was back in bed, her husband looming over her. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake ya, Lou." He grinned sheepishly. "I just couldn't help kissin' ya."

Stretching lazily, Lou rested a hand on her rounded belly. "Listen, cowboy, that's somethin' ya never need apologize fer. You can kiss me anytime."

Kid laughed and put his hand on top of hers. "I think that's probably what got ya into this state, mah dear."

"Then I guess we'll have to resign ourselves to a houseful of children." She pulled him down to the bed, gripped his face, and kissed him with her heart on her lips. "I cain't think of a better fate… As long as I have ya by mah side."

"Always, Lou. Always."

_**I know it's been a while... I appreciate each and every reader, and I hope you'll take the time to review. This story was originally supposed to be lighthearted and sassy... I'm not sure what happened, but clearly Lou did not agree with my plan. Maybe I can do lighthearted another time?**_

_**Many thanks to Beulah for combing this over for me :) I will try to have Buck in the next story. Maybe he'll even be shirtless!**_


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